Turn complaints into observations

Complaints are a simple cocktail: squeeze one observation about reality, add a jigger of resistance, shake with attitude, serve on ice. Fun to sip and serve. Easy to overdo.

Avoid the hangover by turning complaints as observations. A complaint and an observation contain the same facts. The difference is weight:

• “The production team moves slowly” is an observation.
• “I hate that the production team moves so slowly” is an observation soaked in the vinegar of attitude.

Cross-examine your resistance. You might not have beef with the universe. Those superlatives might be pure corn syrup. Stripped of complaint, the story might become:

• “The production team promised something I hoped would be ready sooner.”

Notice how you feel telling it that way. When you consistently express reality as complaint, you reinforce the notion that the world is broken. Yes, there is darkness in the world, but darkness is not the same as evil.

Observations tell a story about the universe, but a complaint is a story about you.